Archive for October 9th, 2003

reprinting: “how could you?”

oh my God…this article took my breath away. one of my Ediets buddies emailed this out to us…..ok - folks, if you’re at work, and you can’t get much privacy - I recommend reading this at another time…..it made me tear up. easily.

but it also made my understand how important it was for my parents to find my dog, Bernie, a good home - even if it was all the way down in Mexico. See my post for 9.26.00. Man, I was so hurt when they gave him away….but honestly….anything is better than what happens to the poor puppy in this article….now, I totally understand how much they love my Bernie - so much, that they knew we were going to lose our home and couldn’t afford to keep anywhere….so - my Dad found a co-worker who was retiring to Mexico. I firmly believe now, that Bernie is happy in that country - with my Dad’s co-worker, roaming free and taken care of by a good family. I believe that now.


A man in Grand Rapids, Michigan incredibly took out a US $7,000 full page ad in the paper to present:

HOW COULD YOU?
By Jim Willis, 2001

When I was a puppy, I entertained you with my antics and made you laugh. You called me your child, and despite a number of chewed shoes and a couple of murdered throw pillows, I became your best friend. …

Whenever I was “bad,” you’d shake your finger at me and ask “How could you?” — but then you’d relent and roll me over for a belly rub.

My housebreaking took a little longer than expected, because you were terribly busy, but we worked on that together. I remember those nights of nuzzling you in bed and listening to your confidences and secret dreams, and I believed that life could not be any more perfect.

We went for long walks and runs in the park, car rides, stops for ice cream (I only got the cone because “ice cream is bad for dogs” you said), and I took long naps in the sun waiting for you to come home at the end of the day.

Gradually, you began spending more time at work and on your career, and more time searching for a human mate. I waited for you patiently, comforted you through heartbreaks and disappointments, never chided you about bad decisions, and romped with glee at your homecomings, and when you fell in love.

She, now your wife, is not a “dog person” — still I welcomed her into our home, tried to show her affection, and obeyed her. I was happy because you were happy.

Then the human babies came along and I shared your excitement. I was fascinated by their pinkness, how they smelled, and I wanted to mother them, too. Only she and you worried that I might hurt them, and I spent most of my time banished to another room, or to a dog crate. Oh, how I wanted to love them, but I became a prisoner of love.”

As they began to grow, I became their friend. They clung to my fur and pulled themselves up on wobbly legs, poked fingers in my eyes, investigated my ears, and gave me kisses on my nose. I loved everything about them and their touch — because your touch was now so infrequent — and I would’ve defended them with my life if need be. I would sneak into their beds and listen to their worries and secret dreams, and together we waited for the sound of your car in the driveway.

There had been a time, when others asked you if you had a dog, that you produced a photo of me from your wallet and told them stories about me. These past few years, you just answered “yes” and changed the subject. I had gone from being “your dog” to “just a dog,” and you resented every expenditure on my behalf.

Now, you have a new career opportunity in another city, and you and they will be moving to an apartment that does not allow pets. You’ve made the right decision for your “family,” but there was a time when I was your only family.

I was excited about the car ride until we arrived at the animal shelter. It smelled of dogs and cats, of fear, of hopelessness. You filled out the paperwork and said “I know you will find a good home for her.” They shrugged and gave you a pained look. They understand the realities facing a middle-aged dog, even one with “papers.”

You had to pry your son’s fingers loose from my collar as he screamed, “No, Daddy! Please don’t let them take my dog!” And I worried for him, and what lessons you had just taught him about friendship and loyalty, about love and responsibility, and about respect for all life.

You gave me a good-bye pat on the head, avoided my eyes, and politely refused to take my collar and leash with you. You had a deadline to meet and now I have one, too. After you left, the two nice ladies said you probably knew about your upcoming move months ago and made no attempt to find me another good home. They shook their heads and asked “How could you?”

They are as attentive to us here in the shelter as their busy schedules allow. They feed us, of course, but I lost my appetite days ago.

At first, whenever anyone passed my pen, I rushed to the front, hoping it was you that you had changed your mind — that this was all a bad dream… or I hoped it would at least be someone who cared, anyone who might save me.

When I realized I could not compete with the frolicking for attention of happy puppies, oblivious to their own fate, I retreated to a far corner and waited. I heard her footsteps as she came for me at the end of the day, and I padded along the aisle after her to a separate room. A blissfully quiet room.

She placed me on the table and rubbed my ears, and told me not to worry. My heart pounded in anticipation of what was to come, but there was also a sense of relief. The prisoner of love had run out of days.

As is my nature, I was more concerned about her. The burden which she bears weighs heavily on her, and I know that, the same way I knew your every mood.

She gently placed a tourniquet around my foreleg as a tear ran down her cheek. I licked her hand in the same way I used to comfort you so many years ago.

She expertly slid the hypodermic needle into my vein. As I felt the sting and the cool liquid coursing through my body, I lay down sleepily, looked into her kind eyes and murmured “How could you?”

Perhaps because she understood my dogspeak, she said “I’m so sorry.” She hugged me, and hurriedly explained it was her job to make sure I went to a better place, where I wouldn’t be ignored or abused or abandoned, or have to fend for myself –a place of love and light so very different from this earthly place.

And with my last bit of energy, I tried to convey to her with a thump of my tail that my “How could you?” was not directed at her. It was directed at you, My Beloved Master, I was thinking of you. I will think of you and wait for you forever. May everyone in your life continue to show you so much loyalty.

 

this is kinda fucked-up…don’t you think?

dude - it’s not. it’s actually an amazingly good idea….

The Salt Lake Tribune — Hatch for foreign-born hopefuls

but i’ve taken to posting too damn quickly….didn’t read the article all the way through and now, I must apologize to Senator Hatch. He’s really a good….must let go of my paranoia of Republican statesmen. They’re not a bad sort. just misguided:

now - I’m a moron…..

(14:19:41) SuperHILAC: ok…i’m confused about one of your entries
(14:19:48) SuperHILAC: from today

(14:19:52) queenkv: which one?
(14:20:12) SuperHILAC: about orrin hatch
(14:20:41) SuperHILAC: your last line…i don’t know how you inferred that hatch thinks immigrants are terrorists
(14:20:46) queenkv: oh yeah - i didn’t get a chance to change that
(14:20:56) SuperHILAC: because he’s the one who wants the immigrants allowed to become president
(14:20:56) queenkv: i didn’t read the article all the way through - my bad
(14:21:01) queenkv: so it’s totally confusing, i know
(14:21:12) SuperHILAC: yeah…it’s like you’re really pissed off at the wrong person
(14:21:12) queenkv: someone else already pointed it out to me….

(14:21:16) queenkv: absolutely….
(14:21:18) queenkv: it’s so my bad
(14:21:19) SuperHILAC: i think you just take it out on republicans…haha

that’s what I get for getting all up in arms against the wrong person….I’m a moron - in a big big way…..

this is what I posted earlier.


lying media bastards posted a bit on the recall and mentioned this article:

The Salt Lake Tribune — Hatch for foreign-born hopefuls

I sent it over to mercury…this is what he had to say:

(12:26:57) mercury: just waiting for the fourth horseman of the apocalype to arrive…. then we can party down…
(12:27:08) queenkv: hahaha
(12:28:14) mercury: hmm…. dated July 16
(12:28:44) mercury: want to eat lunch?
(12:28:55) queenkv: i think i can

(12:30:11) mercury: what time is good for you?
(12:30:17) queenkv: 1pm
(12:30:21) mercury: ok
(12:30:22) queenkv: i’m stuck here till 6 or so
(12:30:25) queenkv: argh…
(12:30:32) queenkv: have to look at an evening mba’s machine
(12:30:38) queenkv: and he can’t get here till 5:30
(12:30:51) mercury: shit..
(12:32:20) queenkv: so…what about the date on that article?

(12:32:44) mercury: how it mentions that Arnold might have a chance at being gov…

odd indeed…..

what does Senator Hatch have against immigrants? Honestly, what is so un-American about an immigrant working over blood, sweat, and tears - to make it to this country and to become a citizen? What is Hatch afraid of?

“”This restriction has become an anachronism that is decidedly un-American,” said Hatch - quoted by the Salt Lake Tribune.

being an immigrant doesn’t make you a candidate for terrorism.


see….i am a moron!

 

Gray

October 9, 2003 - Grey - Look around you and let the grey things stand out. Show us what you find.

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it was gray day on the day of the recall vote in California…..this is the view from Mira Vista Elementary….on of the polling locations…..no touch screen system for us…..

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this the part of the playground at Mira Vista….mark said it looked like some type of cult staging area…..could be…could be….

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sometimes politics makes everything all….gray.

 

i don’t like dreaming about my family….

especially when one ends up in a military prison….man, the clam chowder must have did some funky stuff to my head last night.

i was terrified and freaked out and stressed out.

dude, i don’t need that when i’m trying to sleep and wake up in time for another god-damned opening shift.

but it happens.

last night i dreamnt my cousin was working at a military facility - in their bio lab….ala Wen Ho Lee - she’s arrested wrongfully for sabatoge. Some army prick claimed he could trace her terrorist roots back to Abu Sayyaf. Asshole.

My brother and I inflitrate a top army facility. There was an anti-war protest by students, so it was easy to slip. My bro was gussied up in his Class A uniform - complete with Officer bars….


Basically, he used some “official business” attitude and was able to bluff our way into the main hall. I think this place was JAG-type facility and military courts were held here. It was somewhere in the desert, late at night. I found the office of one of the judges. His secretary insisted that we had to come back during business hours. I begged, with tears in my eye, that my cousin needed a chance to prove herself - that she was in no-way a traitor to her job or her country. The secretary blasted at us - what would we know about patrotism, after simply being naturalized? I yelled at her that we three were born in this country and that we knew a whole hell of a lot about loving this nation. The judge heard us and said he’d set-up an emergency hearing in the main court room.

when we were there, we stood in the middle of the room - three judges were seated high on a gray, metal bench. they brough in Jennie - cuffed. they made her sit down, roughly. My brother was restraining himself - doing his best to resist striking out at their rough treatment. He stood at attention, barely quivering with rage. I didn’t have to adhere to those formalities, as a citizen. I dropped down by Jennie’s side, hugged her….we both cried together…..we were so confused and freaked out. I begged them to un-do her chains. the judges agreed, as long as she stayed seated.

david and i made our case - highlighted jennie’s perfect record - hell, she didn’t even have a traffic ticket to her name. we pointed out how she had no security access to intelligence files. we pointed out her volunteer service with Circle K and the hospital. i blurted out - if anything, they should apologize and recognize her loyalty to this country, regardless of how the military didn’t even give her a shot at a fair trial, among her peers. she was judged without remorse.

one judge agreed - she should be awarded a medal of honor, for her bravery - then he signaled for guards to lock her up and take her away…..the judge added that they will take our testimony into consideration. at this time, the army didn’t have any authority over her, since she was working at an air force facility.

we three were shocked and shaken.