monday monday….

so, i started off my work day with a staff member screaming at me…..before I had my mocha bianca…..yeah. that was nice….thankfully, she acknowledged that she was grumpy and down right irritable – and I was able to get somebody to work on her machine.

after the mocha- i was fine….until i had another student yelling at me…by this time…i stopped caring. sure he could yell and complain, but there’s not much i can do until he shuts up so i could document the issue….which didn’t happen….i think they have this one course here: MBA 103 – “How to skip over the chain of command to get to what you want.”

something like that….

yeah….my customers probably practice Peter’s Laws

last week, i came to a wonderful revelation about myself, in my last session with my therapist:

i am not my job

it’s such a simple concept – but it took me three bloody years to figure it out. i’m not a computer person and this job is not my career. that’s why i’m going back to school. i feel like i can breathe easier since i don’t really care what happens to my chances of establishing myself in the educational IT industry – why should I care? it’s really just something to pay the bills….sure, i’m still upset when i have customers who don’t treat me like a human being….and can see me only as an indentured servant – but what does it matter? i’m not going to see them next semester. just trying to avoid any serious political mind bombs….letting things roll of me….who cares if people ignore my advice? who cares if people refuse to cooperate?

it’s my mantra now…..”i’m not going to see them next semester….” it’s very soothing to me….

now…some sobering thoughts…..i called the detective last monday – she hasn’t got back to me….you know…there’s this sad possiblity that i’m going to have to move on with my life, without getting any resolution from those criminal charges. i want justice. i might not get it. i may have to live with that. i see that possiblity and i’m trying to get myself ready for it. doesn’t mean i’m ready to accept it – i have to much of a fighter’s spirit inside myself, especially when it doesn’t seem like it’s going down right. it will be better when i’m in chicago. at least i won’t have physical locations to remind me how easy it was to violate me.