Category Archives: dreams

a little message about comments and somebody else’s dream…

…hmmm…some people just have it out for Sen. John Kerry. I wanted to see what these ads were about after reading a Tribune article where Sen. John McCain defend’s Kerry military career. I know they’re friends, but I’m impressed by McCain’s loyalty that crosses party lines.

ok…I also got a giggle from the new facelift for the dancing baby – he had a cameo on Ally McBeal…and now he’s just Republican tool….

ah yes…comments on this page….MT Blacklist does not work with the new version of movabletype. And I can’t get the type key comment system running because I’m missing a perl mod on my domain. So….these version of movabletype as a function to preview and approve comments before I let them get posted. That’s what I’m doing now….in order to avoid the fucking spammers…you know who you are….I bet you’re a bit miffed your fucking scripts couldn’t blast my blogs with your ads for Go knows what.

That’s my middle finger at ya – fucking spammers.

So…for the cool people who want to leave a thoughtful comment…you will experience a delay in your comments being posted – until I review them. I’ll try to login on a regular basis to review comments – but I am in school and I have life outside of this blog.

thanks for your understanding on that. screw spammer…die spammer die.

as for that dream…
Continue reading

mark’s coming in for my birthday…

and i’m waiting for this flight to come in….the wait is driving me crazy.

i had a dream that Wurster Hall was on the Northwestern campus. It was the day of our broadcast writing final. We sat around a square table. We had to turn our last compairson papers on CNN Headline News and a network news broadcast. My paper was printed in blue ink because my printer ran out of black ink. This ticked off my professor and she insisted i e-mail her a black ink copy or print one in black ink from a school computer. I said my paper is saved at home. She said I’ll have to go back and get another black ink copy to her. I asked if I could do it after the final and she said no.

I left in a huff. I climbed down a neverending spiral staircase. My intro professor followed me down the stairs, with another professor. They’re now copy editors for our Chicago newsroom. They talked about the other people in my Econ class, and they didn’t notice I could hear them.

I made it out of the building and walked towards Sheridan. One guy from broadcast was waiting to cross the street. He said he already finished the final. He was in a good mood and I hated him for it.

I crossed the street and headed back to my dorm room.

i think this one is a wierd one

but then again, most of my dreams are wierd.

i’m getting more sleep out here in CA. Back in Evanston, I would wake up before my alarm, typically set around 5:50 AM – just because I’m thinking about all the work I have to catch up, for the day. Yeah, I don’t think I was getting a restful sleep there.

Since I’m still on Chicago time, 10:00 pm feels like bed-time….I still wake up around 5 or 6 – but this is after a good night rest. It feels better

I wish I could stay.

i had a dream about my next quarter at Medill. For some reason, I was taking two classes at the same time. This was the case for several of my classmates. Both classes were held in a white greenhouse, shaped like two gazebos. They were connected by a restroom and shower, for guys and gals.

so – the class was set-up to go for thirty minutes followed by a 15 minute break. then we would go through the connecting restroom to the other class for another 30 minutes. This process would repeat itself until we finished an 1 1/2 hour lecture, for both classes.

I did a yoga class before school started. So, I would go to my medill class and still have my workout clothing on. During the 15 minute break, I would take a shower and change into normal clothing.

One day, I ended up taking a shower with my clothing on. My classmates copied me.

what does it mean?

i finally remebered one :)

in the middle of my editing final and i’m freaking out. banging my head on the desk. what is wrong with me? i must be editing at the 7th grade level, if that’s what the average reader is taking in news at that level….

freaking out….

chewing on some cheddar bacon chips….150 calories. not bad.

freaking out….

i held on to my dream this morning. i forced myself to stay in bed until i got recall at least 70 percent of my dream.

first i was shopping with my parents and jennie at cost plus. jennie and i read about $10 givency bracelets. we raced around the store to find them. we found two, one was broken and the other was beautiful – white glass flowers as charms.

another dream where i was excused from an orientation. i was with 2 other broadcast students and we were suppose to take a while at some other media event. it finished early and we returned to the orientation. the instructor looked annoyed and couldn’t believe we were finished.

stil sunny….

i unloaded the truck this afternoon with my dad…he said i drove to slow and that it wasn’t such a big deal to drive a ten-foot truck. he said he once drove a truck at his old job….this was back when unocal was laying everybody off. he was one of the few people left unscathed by the massive lay-offs – he was absorbed into another department. some asshole tried to go off on a power trip on my dad – insisted he drive a truck down to another location. it was manual and my dad didn’t know how to drive stick. the asshole didn’t care. so – my dad drove the truck down imperial highway. thankfully, he didn’t get killed on that trip.

the asshole ended up losing his job – for putting my dad in such a dangerous situation.

i also had an odd dream the other night.

i was in vegas – and it was late at night…..but the sun was still shining out. wes was dragging me and some other folks from one casino to another – waiting for the jackpot to land in his lap. i just about had it, with all the walking. as we stepped into Caesar’s Palace – i saw Mark and Gau and more friends. I was happy to see them, but I didn’t want to do anymore gambling. i was about to head up to my room – then mark grabbed the back of my pants and spun me into his arms. it felt wonderful to be hugged by him. he grabbed so hard, that the elastic broke in my waist band – and my pants almost fell off. i was giggling – it didn ‘t bother me that he almost ripped my pants off. he convinced me to follow his group into the casino. i walked for a bit – but my legs were killing me. i lagged behind too much and lost them. i stopped by an appetizer table and ate a sausage wrapped in bacon.

a cocktail waitress said they’re probably heading to the other side of the casino – to the younger crowd. i convinced her to drive there and show me where it was. we stepped out of the casino and drove to the back of the casino. i couldn’t find a place to park my car. there was some spaces at the edge of a ravine. my car transformed into a scooter – i convinced the waitress to jump down the ravine and i would roll my scooter to her, so she could park it. on the left side was a handicap space. on the other side was scooter parking. so that’s where she parked it.

sunny skies are shining down on me….

sunny skies are shining down on me….

and i’m cherishing every minute of it 🙂

i wish i can bottle this sunshine up and take it with me to chicago….

trying to get some xmas shopping done….i’m at this coffee shop in san dimas – free wireless….nice….

last night – mark and i drove down to la – i took the corolla and mark took th 10-feet budget truck… was trippy to be driving by myself….we got in pretty late to la….mark thought glendale looked beautiful, as we drove down the 134….we almost got separated – i forgot that the 57 was connected to the 210 – not the 60…..some folks think it’s a bit odd that we refer to our freeways with the definite article: “the” ……that’s just how i know them.

we dropped off the truck at my ninang’s house and the went west on the 210 to my bro’s place. one car lot proclaimed it was 34 degrees outside. eeck! this is so. cal! it shouldn’t be close or below freezing! but we were going through the valley, so it’s understandable…..

i did some unexpected crying this week… co-workers chipped in for my new toy – a dell dj jukebox….i squealed with delight when i unwrapped this amazing going away gift, during our staff party. it was a high pitched one. i am amazed that folks chipped in for this. amazed and touched. it was lovely. mark wrapped it up in some left over paper from the lab. that was a lovely surprise. i must admit though, that it ties with the equally lovely card i got from ccstaff and the cons. when i left the lab that evening – i knew it was for good…..sure, i have a telecommuting agreement now….but it’s going to be some time before i stepped foot at haas…..out on the balcony – i bursted out crying – i know i’ll miss all the cool people i work with…..and all the cons. i poured so much of myself into this job, it just left me raw, to say good-bye. to leave my job of 4 1/2 years.

i had a lovely dinner party at jupiters on sat night. david drove up to be apart of the festivties… first, it was just mark, david, and myself….then everybody showed up – an hour later. i was so happy to get a chance to say good-bye….one more time. we drank, had pizza, some gave gifts, and more importantly – it gave me one more chance to imprint them into my heart. betina, hans, mike, nicole, david, priscilla, victor, rosa, linda, wes, susan – i’ll miss you all so very much. each time somebody left the table – to go on to other evening engagements – i teared up. betina and hans made me promise to return for their wedding next summer. it was so hard to say good-bye to Betina, when she has known me at my highest and at my worst…..her love is unconditional and i’m humbled by her generosity.

later, dave, david, mark, wes, and myself jammed over ot cafe jun for some karoke. we went through an extensive playlist – from weezer to britney. it was so much fun. that night was perfect. it was fun….i got to sing….and everyone enjoyed themselves…..the five of us all joined in for queen’s bohemian rhapsody – that was my highlight for the evening.

on sunday – my last mass….i sand breath of heaven, as a solo – with a lovely harmony by lara…..i also cried there. i was terrified to be in front of that mic, but once i heard lara’s accompaniment – i settled down a bit. then i couldn’t stop crying, after the song finished up. later, the choir went off for dinner at the blue nile. mikey and rebecca headed back from napa to join us. wes couldn’t go. i said good-bye to him at church. my God. that was hard. it was like being punched in the gut. i’ve known him since our hall ass. days at unit 3 – he’s been my rock….and later one of my closest friends. it just hit me that i won’t be able to lean on him, when i’m in chicago.

hell – i know i’ll be a teary mess when i say good-bye to mark in chicago….but at least we will be together, in spirit. mark has been so supportive of me – i don’t know if i could have kept my sanity – in the middle of this moving chaos – without him.

ok – time to jump around a bit.

had a funky dream last night! i had some leftover ethiopian food and popcorn chicken, for the trip down to la…..could be my mind churning over that yummy combination…..i’m being saracastic there….

so – first, i’m at a conference with my co-workers. some technology thing – i got super bored – so i stepped out, found a bar, and had a martini. another co-worker ditched the session and joined me at the bar. he started to hit on me. i tried to decline gracefully. mark finally came and saved me from this guy’s affections.

scene changes to my high school – now the site of our lab’s operations. another co-worker started talking to me about marriage. he got me to admit that under different circumstances, we could have hooked up and gotten married. then it got busy – i was suppose to organize something, but i couldn’t remember what. customers bogged me down with questions – then i realized that this co-worker was married. his wife cornered me about that conversation – i said i would straighten him out – it was suppose to be purely speculation. then one of my friends came up to me, to talk about my relationships – she was nude, except for a towel around her waist. i was shocked – i asked her to wrap up and she covered up her chest with the towel. then my student workers showed me a new desktop solution – it was made out of cartons, the ones that carry strawberries in the market. i thought it was a piece of crap. they thought it was the coolest invention.


hey – this song is going out to the last guy to post to this blog….chris – more power to you!

Tragic Kingdom Lyrics – No Doubt

Once was a magical place
Over time it was lost
Price increased the cost
Now the fortune of the kingdom
Is locked up in its dungeon vaults
The castle floor ties in traps
With coiled wires set back
Decoyed by the old cheese
Now the drawbridge has been lifted
As the millions
They drop to their knees
They pay homage to a king
Whose dreams are burried
In their minds
His tears are frozen stiff
Icicles drip from his eyes

The cold wind blows as it snows
On those who fight to get in
On heads that are small
Disillusioned as they enter
They’re unaware what’s
Behind castle walls
But now it’s written in stone
The king has been overthrown

By jesterly fools
And the power of the people
Shall come to believe they do rule

They pay homage to a king
Whose dreams are buried
In their minds
His tears are frozen stiff
Icicles drip from his eyes

Welcome to the tragic kingdom
Cornfields of popcorn
Have yet to spring open

Have they lost their heads
Or are they just all blind mice
We’ve heard all their stories
One too many times
Hypnotized by fireflies

That glow in the dark
Midgets that disguise themselves
As tiny little dwarfs
The parade that’s electrical
It serves no real purpose
Just takes up a lot of juice
Just to impress us

They pay homage to a king

Whose dreams are burried
In their minds
His tears are frozen stiff
Icicles drip from his eyes

Ohh, they drip from his eyes
Into the night
They drip from his eyes

Welcome to the tragic kingdom

Cornfields of popcorn
Have yet to spring open

Welcome to the tragic kingdom (faster)
Welcome to the tragic kingdom (faster)
Welcome to the tragic kingdom (faster)
Welcome to the tragic kingdom (faster)
Welcome to the tragic kingdom (faster)
Welcome to the tragic kingdom (faster)

Welcome to the tragic kingdom (faster)
Welcome to the tragic kingdom (faster)

reality TV getting into my dreams….

ok – maybe it was the stuffing or the mashed potatoes….or both! i woke up confused….a little disturbed…..and with a lot of gas…..

the first part of dream was in a reality TV show – this guy was traveling across the US – from NY to CA – to prove to his girlfriend in LA – how much he loved her. The producers of the show had a meeting with him in Arizona – they outlined the final leg of the trip. They wanted him to finish the trip, walking. He thought they were insane – but he was finally convinced that it was a good idea. He could picture himself droppping at her feet, as he entered LA. The producers said, well no – they had planned on cleaning him up, before he meets her – they didn’t want to gross her out.

the next part of my dream took place in Alfred Hitchcock’s house. It was a very goth affair – and his two adult children joined us for dinner. There was a creepy butler, but he looked like the one from Joe Millionaire, Paul.


[ from fox’s joe millionaire]

We kept talking about his movies – anaylzing them. There was also a billboard cutout of an actor from one of his movies, standing near the wall. According to his kids – this was a magic billboard that granted wishes, in a diablolical way. Hitchcock was thinking of a wish, that couldn’t be granted in a diabolical way.

Some how, the billboard disappears – and Hitchcock was quite sad. He son ended up in the house’s attic – which looked like the upper wings of a theater. He found a similar billboard – but he wasn’t certain if it had the same magical properties. Two other people were trying to grab the billboard away from him – he wished they would go away. They did and plunged to their deaths from the creepy attic area.

Then it was desert time. The butler served these peach tapioca thingies. The kids confessed to me that they were worried we wouldn’t get out of this house alive. They thought Hitchcock was a little too wrapped up in his movies, and wanted to be one of his insane killers.

The butler had also mixed up a sleeping posion in the kitchen. He dipped the daughter’s mice into the mix and fed them to her cats. The daughter said it was difficult to give the cats a bath, when they’re awake. This way made it easier. The kids had me freaked out – so they convinced me to take that sleeping poison and give it to their father, somehow.

I noticed Hitchcock in the kitchen. I took a small pushpin and dipped it into the sleeping poison mix. Then I walked up to Hitchcock, took his hand, and stuck the pushpin into his flesh. When I looked up into his face, it wasn’t Hitchcock – it was the sensei from my Hankido Club…….I felt ashamed.

The kids brought me back into the living room – a documentary was playing about the man who owned this house – their father. he was a nazi sympatheizer. The film kept cutting between all the world leaders, who were his buddies – and they were trying to speak German to him, and scenes of chaos, from outside the house. Some of the world leaders featured were Churchhill and Eisenhower, both trying to speak German. Then the film reveals what the chaos outside of his house, centered on. He led a mad crowd to overpower his parents. He wanted to crucify them.

I ran out of the house….

What a freaky dream.